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No.1
ales of Team Carborundum
 
   
 
Jesse May
 
 
Jesse May, multiple author in the gambling field and sometimes dubded the "voice of poker", writes a bi-weekly column.
 
Most people know Jesse as "the voice of poker" from his colourful commentary in CH4's late Night Poker. Jesse is also the author of the widely respected novel, Shut Up And Deal, which looks deep into the poker playing life. Its the hard faced 21st Century Cincinnati Kid.

Jesse is also the creator of The Gambler's Guide to the World, an insiders look at the action and games around the world.
 
Email : Jesse May
 
 
 
 
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    A lot of Europeans made the trip from the motherland to tackle the pioneers in Reno, Nevada, at a month long poker tournament held there in January. European results were less than adequate, especially considering the quality and breadth of the contingent they sent. As I've tried to tell the Europeans, it's very tough to beat American poker players when they're only paying $18 a night for their hotel room. We Americans thrive on that stuff, that nit-picking, angle shooting, expense covering, four dollars a day for your overhead and play so tight as a Monte Cristo sandwich kind of poker. You don't think there was any actual gambling going on there, do you? Well, maybe someone got really drunk. To beat an American poker player, it's nice to have them off their home turf. It's nice when you open up their noses, when they bleed a little, when they start complaining about being charged for water and having to tip the waitress and how there's not enough of the little soaps in their room. The Americans were virtually all off their games this past November on the Isle of Man. It was a pool of blood.

Team Carborundum is in deep on the Oscar markets, now just thinking about escape. It's mostly Cato's fault. Cato the Greek, a charter Team Carborundum member, has long been the TC goto guy on Oscar night, making his bones one long cold dollar betting frenzied evening when he emptied the room by backing long odds on and covering all bets against the now fabled Pele the Conqueror for best foreign film. Back in the day you couldn't even get a legal bet on the Oscars, and serious punters resorted to formal gatherings with large stacks of dollar bills, beer, and the biggest TV we could muster. Betting, as always, was fast and furious, and not limited to the categories. Wagering on what tattoos would be visible through Cher's dress was always an action event.

But Cato has always been spot on with the Oscar nods, racking up impressive results in all major categories while paying no attention to the ill-informed masses. Therefore, when he made the pronouncement about Gladiator, "This is no Titanic", Team Carborundum nearly tripped over its own feet in the line to the betting window, shoving across money with both hands in that tried and true method of "Bet now, think later."

The Greek's foils are Traffic for Best Picture and Geoffrey Rush for Best Actor, and a multitude of bets highlighted by the holding of an 84-1 exacta ticket on both those events will see TC comfortably strapped in for the awards ceremony. However, the death of all bettors, the second guess, has reared its ugly head in the worst way, because calls have come in to the Team Carborundum hotline with some shocking news. Crouching Tiger, the Chinese outsider for Best Picture and Best Director, is actually a good movie! It's information like this that TC just doesn't need, heading happily into the bliss without having actually seen any of the movies up for awards, content with the knowledge that quality means nothing in relation to the prizes themselves, and the good punter, the smart bettor, thinks only about politics.

So you can understand the danger Team Carborundum now faces. Should it go deeper in the markets, covering eventualities by betting on quality? What you have before you is clear. Nothing is so disturbing as a man on Oscar tilt.

 
    Editor's note
Carborundum : exceedingly hard, synthetically produced crystalline compound of silicon and carbon